Buy an island and fill it with giraffes dressed as dinosaurs. We'll charge nothing and call it GIRAFFIC PARK
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 31, 2014
*ding dong*
"Hello! And what are you supposed to be?"
"Don't you ask yourself that every day?"
"Take this chocolate and never come back."— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 31, 2014
https://twitter.com/SamGrittner/status/527313402264584193
*pours milk over cow*
You're home now— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 29, 2014
*puts ear to ground*
"Dirt's a-comin'"— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 27, 2014
THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS COOL: JUST. BE. YOU!
…maybe untuck your shirt
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 25, 2014