"BIKINI SEASON IS ALMOST HERE: 10 WAYS TO HATE YOURSELF MORE" -Women's Magazines
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 8, 2013
Yeah, let's store all our information in the clouds WHERE THE BIRDS WILL LEARN EVERYTHING. Real smart, nerds.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 7, 2013
I can't afford traditional therapy anymore so I just go to IKEA, lie down on a couch, and wait for someone to ask if they can help me.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 4, 2013
Do you know what they call April Fool's Day in China? NOTHING BECAUSE THEY ARE GETTING SHIT DONE.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 1, 2013
Upcoming MoMa Exhibitions
UPCOMING MoMa EXHIBITIONS:
*Dave Grohl Folds His Laundry
*Gwyneth Paltrow Opens and Closes a Refrigerator
*Steve Guttenberg Buys Sandals— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) March 24, 2013
UPCOMING MoMa EXHIBITIONS:
*Beck Looks For His Keys
*Sally Field Takes Boniva With Iced Tea
*John Stamos Tries on Vests
*Jamie Lee Curtis Is— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) March 24, 2013
UPCOMING MoMa EXHIBITIONS:
*Harrison Ford Breaks Into a Truck
*Chloë Sevigny Fills Out Her Taxes
*Kristen Stewart Texts
*Bono Saves Algeria— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) March 25, 2013
Steal pictures of your friend's dog & put up 'Missing!' posters. Complete strangers will accost your friend. Ted will learn who's in charge.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) March 5, 2013