I've been giving away my talents for free for decades fml pic.twitter.com/FMt9kcsVPf
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 17, 2016
What's your favorite type of tree? Mine is books.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 8, 2016
I would watch "The Bachelorette" if all the contestants had adult braces.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 7, 2016
I thought she was extraordinarily quiet but I dated a leather jacket for two years.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) May 25, 2016
ME: Are you sure you want to go all the way?
DATE: Yes. Let's join ISIS tonight— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) May 25, 2016
Beauty AND the beast? In this economy???
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) May 23, 2016