Nothing hotter than a woman in scrubs. "Hey girl, you about to go get your cure on?"
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) July 17, 2013
FREE WIFI PASSWORDS:
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) July 16, 2013
I believe the children are our future but no spoilers please
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) July 15, 2013
Shhhhhh! Your jean jacket is telling me a story and you're interrupting
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) July 15, 2013
If you say matthew mcconaughey three times in a row your shoes and shirt just disappear for good
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) July 13, 2013
So much young talent is online. This week I put down the blackjack cards and finally got around to talking to Internet “funsation” (I made that term up and promise never to use it again) Brendan O’Hare. He met me in a dark alley in the back of the Internet and we chatted about what floats his boat, soda, tigers, and a bunch of other stuff. Tell your mother you’ll call her later, you’ve got a date with words that starts right now.
LET’S GET TO KNOW: BRENDAN O’HARE (@BrendoOHare)
DATE TIP: Hold doors. Pull the chair out for your date. Burp your date. Change your date oh god you are on a date with a baby ok stay cool
— Brendan O'Hare (@brendohare) August 8, 2012
Hi! Who the hell are you and what are you doing on my porch?
Hello! My name is Brendan O’Hare, a local boy known throughout the town for my ability to stack a mean pile of bananas at the farmer’s market. I’m on your porch because I would like to talk to you about the good word of a little guy named Jesus Christ, son of Mr. Christ.
How long have you been doing the laughies? Do you do comedy aside from Twitter?
I have been telling jokes on Twitter for about a year now. Aside from that, I was on my school’s improv team last year, but I just transferred schools. So I doubt they’ll be having me back. I’m going to school in the New York City come August, and I plan on doing open mics and UCB. I also will put poorly-executed sketches up online from time to time.
How many tigers is enough?
Not enough, am I right!!! Am I?
What’s your favorite activity to do in real life?
I guess reading, like any good shut-in.
Who’s your favorite comedian working right now?
Probably John Mulaney. His work ethic is incredibly inspiring for a young comedian like m’self, and it’s amazing to watch someone and know that they are going to be one of the most influential people in comedy in a few years. His show not getting picked up by NBC was a horrible bummer. I’ve also really gotten into Bo Burnham lately, whose willingness to alter the traditional rigid stand-up style is really innovative and remarkable to watch.
The roof is on fire, WHAT DO WE DO????
Get rid of my journals that entail my plan to burn down the roof.
What’s the worst part about comedy?
Knowing my only skill has literally no purpose in a post-apocalyptic world.
What’s the best part about comedy?
Being around other funny people who make you a funnier person by some sort of hilarity osmosis.
What would you do for this crumpled $2 bill?
Mistake it for garbage.
What are the five topics you tweet about the most?
The frailty of the human race, cliches, popular culture figures like the Hamburglar, rap music, and Air Bud (although I’d like to think I have retired Air Bud tweets, he will certainly make a comeback, but not a good comeback, like a Michael Jordan on the Wizards comeback).
How often do you tweet?
About 5-7 times a day, and I delete 4-5 of those because I am a horrible garbage person.
What do you wish more people would joke about?
Global warming deniers.
Name two underrated people I should look at on the Twitter please and thank you!
What’s a great book you just read?
I’ll give you the great book I’m reading NOW: I Found This Funny, a compilation of funny short stories edited togther by Judd Apatow.
What would stop you from doing comedy?
A minor setback, like a negative internet comment.
How am I doing? Can you smell the watermelons?
You’re doing fine! If nothing, I smell like watermelons because of my part-time job at the town supermarket’s produce department.
What advice do you have for people? Any at all.
Just be a nice person, care about others, and don’t talk to me or look me in the eyes.
Can you give me a ride to the Shell station up the road?
Sure, but you’ll have to find your own ride back because you talked to me.
"We've got too many Irons in the fire." – Jeremy Irons, assessing a family reunion gone horribly wrong
— Brendan O'Hare (@brendohare) December 18, 2012