I don’t know who needs to hear this right now but CAW! CAW, CAW, CAW!
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) July 7, 2019
If you only see 2-3 crows together that’s an attempted murder.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 21, 2019
(to the tune of Beastie Boys’ GIRLS)
Birds, all I really want is birds
And in the morning it’s birds
‘Cause in the evening it’s birds
Birds, to eat the fishes
Birds, to shit on my car
Birds, to eat the bread bread
Birds, and in the Arby’s parking lot
Birds, birds, birds, birds
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 1, 2018
I was walking past a park and overheard a man talking to his wife/girlfriend/partner and he said “Why didn’t you call me yesterday? You don’t have work today? You aren’t as beautiful as you used to be, you know that?” No one responded so I looked. He was talking to a pigeon.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) August 23, 2018
Going forward I shall only be referring to the sky as “the bird ocean”. I will not be taking questions at this time.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) August 22, 2018
Instead of throwing stones and worrying about efficiency, maybe just stop killing birds.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) May 6, 2018