The nice thing about comedy is that once you've proven yourself to be truly funny, all you have to do is that every day after that forever.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 24, 2016
Be the therapy your parents should have gone through twenty years ago.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 21, 2016
This Father's Day get him the gift he'll never forget: stop being a disappointment for one day out of your fucking life like your siblings
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 19, 2016
The best thing I ever did with my 20s was turn 30.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 18, 2016
I've been giving away my talents for free for decades fml pic.twitter.com/FMt9kcsVPf
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 17, 2016
What's your favorite type of tree? Mine is books.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 8, 2016