*on first date*
"I'll have what she's having"
"I'm sorry sir but the lady hasn't ordered yet"
"Excellent. The check whenever you're ready"
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 17, 2015
*goes on first date*
*eats spaghetti with her like in lady and the tramp*
Waiter: Sir, you and the terrier need to leave immediately
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 14, 2014