If you weren't born with perfect eyesight you don't deserve glasses pic.twitter.com/Ev6usEdJyR
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 13, 2017
Want to buy a gun? Cool. Promise you're not crazy. Promise? Cool. Want birth control? Whoa, lady. Let me ask five old dudes real slow first
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) July 5, 2014