I love the message behind people who know karate: I will never, ever resort to violence, unless you force my hand, in which case I'm going to roundhouse your face into the sun, bitch.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) November 16, 2017
If you pull on a man's ponytail long enough, a coupon will drop down from the sky that's good for six free karate lessons.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) November 22, 2015