INTERIOR DECORATOR: "What color were you thinking for the room?"
NICOLAS CAGE: "Sword."— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 6, 2015
"Father, is that you?" – Nicolas Cage looking at a nest of crows
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) May 28, 2015
25 FACTS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT: NICOLAS CAGE
25 FACTS YOU DIDN’T KNOW ABOUT: NICOLAS CAGE
1) His middle name is Batting
2) He has touched the Holy Grail with his dick at least once today
3) He has been alive for 8,000 years and dead for 7,825
4) His favorite kind of music is Bluegrassorangefield
5) He has never seen a cow
6) He has killed over twenty people on movie sets (not while filming)
7) He has never made direct eye contact with himself
8) He has no idea what a movie is
9) He has more swords than you have cells in your body
10) He can speak to dogs, chairs, certain sauces, and the Mayor of Cleveland through telepathy
11) He has never eaten a hot dog that he hasn’t personally made
12) He soaks his car keys in his own blood
13) He has no idea who Ralph Nader is
14) He once worked for the CIA, smuggling ACTUAL arms to Cuba
15) He invented water polo when he was high on embalming fluid with Einstein
16) He is scared of horses and watermelons
17) He believes bad luck is only real if you didn’t pay the witch with actual money
18) He owns a castle made entirely of leather
19) He speaks perfect English but only in Chinese
20) His adopted child is really a sandbox full of gravy and golden toothpicks
21) He has no idea what global warming is
22) He believes most children are holograms or sandboxes
23) He only makes love in coffins or space shuttles
24) He built his own DNA in a haunted vineyard
25) He wants to ride a horse into the sun but this time do it to inspire the children