DETECTIVE: Are you the new chalk outline guy?
ME: Yes I am
DETECTIVE: Stick to the bodies, no more thought bubbles with spaghetti inside them
ME: Eve-
DETECTIVE: Yes, even if they were thinking about spaghetti— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) March 26, 2018
Every time I share an Uber I turn to the person next to me and ask, “How much spaghetti in the attic is too much spaghetti in the attic?” Before they can answer I inform them it’s a trick question, I only make lasagna. Then I open my door and jump and roll
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) February 24, 2018
don't even begin to imagine how much spaghetti we could fit on the moon
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 8, 2015