"This place sucks and everybody is negative."
"Do you want to leave?"
"Fuck no!"
-The Internet— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 3, 2013
If 2 Chainz leaves a concert in CA on a boat traveling 98 mph & Busta Rhymes gets mad ill on said boat, how many chains is 2 Chainz wearing?
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 2, 2013
MAYBE SHE WAS BORN WITH IT, MAYBE IT'S DANIEL DAY-LEWIS
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 1, 2013
"911, what's your emergency?"
"THERE'S A GIANT APE THROWING BARRELS AT PEOPLE. HE KIDNAPPED A WOMAN!"
"We're sending our best plumber now."— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) August 31, 2013
You can take the bear out of the zoo but you can't take the zoo police on all by yourself trust me, even if you encourage the bear to help
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) August 31, 2013
*opens backpack*
*takes out fanny pack*
*opens fanny pack*
*takes out coin purse*
*open coin purse*
*sees virginity is safe and sound*— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) August 30, 2013