If you ever suffer from feelings, keep pushing them further down into your subconscious until they emerge as beautiful eruptions at Target.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 30, 2015
*me at haunted house at age 15*
"This is scary!"
*me at haunted house at age 33*
"This is scary. Ghosts have houses and I'm still renting."— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 27, 2015
Halloween is coming up and I still have no idea what I'm going to be for the rest of my life.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 27, 2015
DONALD TRUMP: This guy barely speaks American. I would deport him if I were in charge
POPE: I forgive you, constant idiot— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 25, 2015
Being an adult feels like you're the only one cleaning up after a huge party you didn't get to attend.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 25, 2015
POPE: Climate change is real
GOP: We believe you just not the words you're saying— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 24, 2015