*friend notices extra toothbrush at my place*
“Sam does this mean what I think it does you old dog?”
“Yep. One for morning, one for night”— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 17, 2015
J. J. Abrams real name is LL Cool J. J. Abrams
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 16, 2015
*time travel interview*
"Where do you see yourself in 5 years?"
"When"
"What?"
"When do I see myself in 5 years"
"Can you start yesterday?"— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 16, 2015
If Google ever goes down and stays down, I'm fucked. I know four facts and they're all about elephants and I already forgot three of them.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 14, 2015
"This is why we can't have nice Kings." – Game of Thrones
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 13, 2015
Pretty baller move of Hillary to announce completely in Dothraki
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 12, 2015