The new Joker has never missed a Warped Tour.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 25, 2015
My neck
My back
My zebra and my yak— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 25, 2015
Instead of conjugal visits they should be called guilty pleasures.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 23, 2015
"Like a horse but with the saddle inside." – god creating camels
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 23, 2015
There were only vanilla milkshakes until some asshole said "Toss some strawberries in that shit!" Be that asshole. Toss berries at the world
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 19, 2015
They say "don't bottle your feelings up." I disagree. Put them in mason jars & sell them on Etsy. I've made hundreds of dollars from lonely
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 18, 2015