BREAKING NEWS: Supreme Court exercises common sense
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 26, 2013
*** Featured on FUNNY OR DIE’s The Best Tweets Following the Supreme Court’s Overturn of DOMA and Prop 8 ***
I'm at the point where I don't even like making eye contact with my phone
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 25, 2013
Twinkies will be back starting July 15th. Finally, some good news for Paula Deen.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 24, 2013
Paula Deen hired as Sous-chef at CRACKER BARREL.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 23, 2013
My rap name is 'THE BUFFET' so don't step to me cuz you'll never stop getting served.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 21, 2013
Collect the morning dew. Bathe your soul in it. Feed a squirrel. Why did you do all that? You're late for work. Stop listening to me.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 20, 2013