He died doing what he loved: skateboarding into volcanoes.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 19, 2013
I want to do NSA jokes but I feel like they've heard them all before.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 18, 2013
If 2 Chainz leaves a club with 9 Young $ Millionaires at 1am in CA & Yeezus leaves ChiTown with No Limit, how many problems does Jay-Z have?
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 17, 2013
When Kim Kardashian was in labor she asked what that was.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 15, 2013
NEW NAMES FOR TEETH:
•Gobblers
•The Rows
•Noam Chompskis
•Corn Movers
•Word Silos
•Calcium Claws
•Old Yellers
•Shinies
•Mouth Mountains— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 15, 2013
NEW NAMES FOR FEET:
•Walkies
•Push-a-rounds
•Dirt Homes
•Hop-To-Its!
•The Jumpies
•Rumskis
•Dance Propellers
•Movies
•Not Hands— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) June 13, 2013