If you pull down any book in the George W. Bush Center, the entire wall 360's with you on it, revealing a 24-hour Hooters.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 28, 2013
If you push a man's ponytail all the way into his skull, a diploma drops from the sky and he's got a second chance on life.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 28, 2013
I love Jack White but sometimes he looks like an anorexic Juggalo.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 25, 2013
Don't unlock the doors to the Bush Center until George W. pronounces nuclear correctly.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 25, 2013
If Einstein was so "smart" then why did he die?
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 24, 2013
FREE GIGGLES: Imagine a Jamaican dude trying to order a ticket to Yemen.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 22, 2013