I don’t ride the subway often anymore, ever since the ALLEGED “wolverines and Ketamine” incident on the F-Train a few months back, but when I do manage to sneak under a manhole and make the jump onto a speeding train, I try and soak up everyone around me. When I do, I tend to assign them my own made-up personalities. Here is who I saw today:

  • Asian Steve Jobs
  • A Wall Street hustler
  • Asian Steven Tyler
  • A spiffy lawyer
  • Asian Yoko Ono
  • A gay lumberjack
  • Asian Banksy
  • A kid with a lunchbox and weird eyebrows
  • Asian Jesse Plemons
  • A fruit vendor with ulterior motives
  • Asian Carmen San Diego
  • A bird inside a top hat
  • Asian Scatman Crothers
  • A scientist and his concubine
  • Asian Joan of Arc
  • A mental health expert with three hands
  • Asian Ted Nugent
  • A blind woman wearing a THIRD EYE BLIND t-shirt
  • Asian Rob Thomas

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