ME: Please let me slam dunk watermelons with Jesus in my dreams tonight
BRAIN: I'll do you one better, you can drown slowly in your mistakes— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) November 21, 2016
Instead of "Happy Holidays" or "Merry Christmas," I prefer to use the non-controversial, "We're all dying slowly but you look great today!"
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) November 21, 2016
We’re All Gonna Die Tonight hosted by Sam Grittner and Pat Tobin
Sam Escobar, Patrick Holbert, Chloe McGovern, Victor Varnado, Alyssa Limperis, Myka Fox and more!
FRIDAY, December 2nd // 7:30PM // $5 // The Experiment Comedy Gallery, 272 Grand Street,
Basement Level, Brooklyn
Trump supporters appear to be softening their positions as well, a lot of the new swastikas they're painting are rainbow-colored.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) November 14, 2016
Right now Twitter feels like a funeral home where half the people are paying respects and the other half are playing laser tag.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) November 14, 2016
USE CAUTION WHEN TAKING SHIMMERING ORB OUT OF SUITCASE pic.twitter.com/XhmaUkJxJD
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) November 12, 2016