Whenever I see someone with a flip-phone it's fun to try & figure out if they're a drug dealer, time traveler, or time-traveling drug dealer
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) December 16, 2015
*kid shows up wearing all tinfoil*
KID: Trick-or-treat!
ME: That ship sailed, friendo. What are you?
KID: Time traveler
ME: *empties wallet*— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) November 5, 2015
*time travel interview*
"Where do you see yourself in 5 years?"
"When"
"What?"
"When do I see myself in 5 years"
"Can you start yesterday?"— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 16, 2015
I broke my time machine next week 🙁
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) May 6, 2014