How to Intimidate Your Enemies:
1. Buy snakes, so many snakes
2. Hope the snakes have good advice on how to intimidate your enemies— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 22, 2015
When you die you head towards a light. You're gonna see a big void of darkness, you want to take a right at the void. Now go past the Arby's
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 21, 2015
"One final thing."
*biden and obama put on helmets*
"We are: Daft Punk"
*around the world starts playing*— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 21, 2015
"Hi I'm Rob Lowe."
"And I'm Neil deGrasse Tyson Lowe here to explain how we can both exist in this duality."— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 20, 2015
I'm worried that I'm not worried that I'm always worried.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 19, 2015
"I've always wanted to see what a horse factory looks like."
"Sir, this is a barn."— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 18, 2015