SHOUT-OUT TO MY DRUNK NEIGHBORS THAT ARE BUILDING A BIRDHOUSE! 2 AM IS PRIMETIME FOR WOODWORK! ASK THE BABY JESUS!
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) December 22, 2013
"I'll have what she's having." – Hilarious fetus
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) December 21, 2013
Every car is a taxi if you have a gun
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) December 20, 2013
Opinions are like assholes: I always have at least one
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) December 20, 2013
One nice thing about being broke is that you're already finished Christmas shopping before you've even started.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) December 19, 2013
https://twitter.com/SamGrittner/status/412743276723470336