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Writer. Comedian. Space Whale.

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Category: Joke of the Day

Posted on September 28, 2013October 1, 2013

"HEISENBERG?"
"HEISENBERG?"
"HEISENBERG?"
…
(Walter White sits in the back of Starbucks and can't stop smiling)

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 28, 2013

Posted on September 27, 2013October 1, 2013

Loneliness is what happens when sad gets confident.

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 27, 2013

Posted on September 26, 2013October 1, 2013

Don't waste money on nice clothes to bury me in when I die. Roller skates and a tiara will suffice.

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 27, 2013

Posted on September 25, 2013October 1, 2013

Apparently telling someone they have a nice skeleton sheath isn't the same as complimenting their skin

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 25, 2013

Posted on September 24, 2013October 1, 2013

BREAKING BAD FINALE THEORY: Walt stays in and watches "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium." BOTH COPIES.

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 24, 2013

Posted on September 23, 2013October 1, 2013

*god changes history from repeat to shuffle*

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 23, 2013

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