I believe Hillary will win but just in case I practice the Mockingjay whistle for at least two hours every day.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 17, 2016
I don't speak a lick of German yet somehow I know the answer is, "YES!!!!!!!" pic.twitter.com/P3OG1Yr130
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 14, 2016
I need an app that's just Michelle Obama reassuring me that everything is going to be okay.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 13, 2016
Why would we believe women who are being honest about Trump sexually assaulting them? It's not like there's a tape of him bragging about it.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 12, 2016
Never say the phrase "sexual conquest," unless you rode upon a mighty steed and thusly slayed a dragon before a Princess granted consent.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 11, 2016
Walk into a mansion today and inform the owners that it's yours now. Happy Columbus Day!
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 10, 2016