Girl are you my wifi cause I thought we had a connection and you’re always looking for bars
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 29, 2013
https://twitter.com/SamGrittner/status/329033278961115136
If you pull down any book in the George W. Bush Center, the entire wall 360′s with you on it, revealing a 24-hour Hooters.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 28, 2013
If you push a man’s ponytail all the way into his skull, a diploma drops from the sky and he’s got a second chance on life.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 28, 2013
I love Jack White but sometimes he looks like an anorexic Juggalo.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 25, 2013
Don’t unlock the doors to the Bush Center until George W. pronounces nuclear correctly.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) April 25, 2013