For Halloween I'm going as a Living Wage because none of my friends have ever seen that before.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 6, 2016
MODERATOR: What's your greatest accomplishment?
KAINE: My perfect game of ski-ball!
PENCE: I drowned three witches that kept floating— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 5, 2016
Trump supporters are the same people who touch the fajita skillet, then complain about how hot it is, even though they were warned.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 4, 2016
TRUMP: I'm the best at business. Extraordinary. Just the best
REPORTER: You lost one billion dollars
TRUMP: Hillary Clinton is a lesbian
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 2, 2016
Tiffany slips the envelope into the mailbox, clutching a photo of her father, "You didn't pay taxes but you'll finally pay attention to me."
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) October 2, 2016
TO-DO TODAY:
• Escape through food
• Watch the world burn
• Question my true motives
• Repeat same mistakes with different people
• Not die— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 30, 2016