How much fun was the person who invented coasters? They were probably also responsible for coining the phrase, "Could you not?"
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) March 3, 2015
"Kids, I'd like to talk to you about the birds and the bees"
*closes blinds, turns up stereo*
*holds up sign that reads, THEY'RE EVERYWHERE*— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) February 28, 2015
This is journallism pic.twitter.com/6aGhCFwjpv
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) February 27, 2015
If you think llamas and the color of an article of clothing are the lowest we place the bar on intelligence, may I introduce you to society?
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) February 27, 2015
Great. I just spilled my life all over my dreams.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) February 25, 2015
Tea is diet soup.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) February 23, 2015