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Writer. Comedian. Space Whale.

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Tag: Joke of the Day

Posted on September 24, 2013October 1, 2013

BREAKING BAD FINALE THEORY: Walt stays in and watches "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium." BOTH COPIES.

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 24, 2013

Posted on September 23, 2013October 1, 2013

*god changes history from repeat to shuffle*

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 23, 2013

Posted on September 21, 2013October 1, 2013

https://twitter.com/SamGrittner/status/381426102666686466

Posted on September 19, 2013October 1, 2013

*Kanye editing Kim out of their sex tapes so it's just him*

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 19, 2013

Posted on September 11, 2013October 1, 2013

INTERVIEWING TIPS:
*Make direct eye contact
*Body slam them to show how much intensity you can bring to the table
*Bring a spare mustache

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 11, 2013

Posted on September 10, 2013October 1, 2013

People only want to do drugs named after women: Mary Jane, Molly, Lucy (in the Sky with Diamonds). No one wants to snort some Craig.

— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 11, 2013

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