If the show doesn't end with the entire cast of "Westworld" murdering everyone in the room then we all watched for nothing.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 9, 2017
Featured in Playboy.com’s 25 of the Funniest Golden Globe Tweets
Life is a highway: its infrastructure is crumbling, there's trash everywhere, and in the future it will mostly be navigated by ghost vessels
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 8, 2017
WE NEED TO PROTECT THE UNBORN AT ALL COSTS, THEY ARE PRECIOUS DIAMONDS AND A REFLECTION OF OUR HUMANITY!
what about poor people?
HARD PASS
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 4, 2017
TRUMP: I think murdering, for the most part, is a bad idea
PRESS: "Donald Trump Has Matured Into The President We Need"— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 3, 2017
REPUBLICAN (running for office): We need to make haircuts safer!
REPUBLICAN (in office): Haircuts will only be done using chainsaws.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 3, 2017
Piers Morgan is the guy who sends food back, makes the waiter cry, gets the meal taken off the bill, then tells himself out loud, "I won."
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) January 1, 2017
I ended up in a spat with Piers Morgan online that started when he searched his own name, then tried to shame me, and ended with him making fun of a dead Holocaust survivor. Happy New Year!