POPE: Do you have any sins you'd like to confess?
OBAMA: You mean the drones?
POPE: I meant for how you murdered your two terms
*they hi-5*— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 23, 2015
I want to become a librarian so bad. I love books but I love telling people to shut up even more.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 23, 2015
Always be yourself. Just not too much, right away.
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 22, 2015
The nice thing about insomnia is that you won't die in your sleep
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 19, 2015
https://twitter.com/SamGrittner/status/644735925424136193
*cut to mike huckabee eating an entire sleeping bag full of hot dogs*
— Sam Grittner (@SamGrittner) September 17, 2015